


No Place In Heaven

by TryingToScribble



Series: Song Prompts [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Tears, but happy in that they're so frickin in love that it doesn't matter, it's not an entirely happy ending?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-22 11:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22682170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TryingToScribble/pseuds/TryingToScribble
Summary: Listening to MIKA when you're in a weird place makes you write about sad angels and demons apparently.---“What did you pray for?”“You.” Aziraphale answered immediately. “To always be with you.” Then he hesitated before adding his final confession. “Even if that means not being an angel anymore.”
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Song Prompts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1631662
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	No Place In Heaven

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the song [No Place In Heaven](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VuHIDKTo1CU) By MIKA

Aziraphale woke with a start and flung his arm out to the other side of the bed. The bed was empty but for him. The sheets were still warm, though, so Crowley couldn’t have gone very far.

The angel pushed himself up and out of bed. It was cold so he took his admittedly fluffy white dressing gown off the back of the bedroom door and slipped into it. Then he slipped out of the bedroom looking for his demon.

He followed the only other source of light to the closed bathroom door down the hall. He didn’t open it because it was the bathroom and although Crowley had no need of the bathroom as humans did, it was still a room of privacy and Aziraphale respected that. After all, there must be a reason Crowley was in there rather than in bed with him.

Aziraphale stepped up to the door and lifted a hand to knock on the wood. However, before his knuckles connected the sound of Crowley’s voice stopped him. The voice sounded so desperate and wounded, almost begging, but the conversation was almost certainly one-sided. The angel swallowed. He had sounded like that enough times to understand what Crowley was doing but he would never have thought that the demon would do that. Not anymore, at least. Crowley had even told Aziraphale that he wouldn’t and Aziraphale had chosen to interpret that as he couldn’t. It seemed he was wrong.

Knowing it was wrong but not knowing what else to do, Aziraphale pressed an ear to the door and listened.

“Please. Please! Please.”

Crowley sounded hysterical and that was almost enough to get Aziraphale to stop eavesdropping. Almost. Crowley had more to say, though.

“I know there’ll come a time… I know there’ll come a time when we have to leave Earth. Whether it’s from the fighting or The Great Plan or the destruction of the planet. Whatever. That time will come and he won’t follow me to hell. He can’t. I wouldn’t let him. I won’t let him fall.”

Aziraphale felt his heart start to break. His demon sounded so lost and broken in the certainty that Aziraphale wouldn’t follow Crowley anywhere he went, including hell. He would never leave Crowley. He could never!

“I refuse to let you make him fall. I refuse.” Crowley sniffed and it sounded like he covered his mouth to stifle a sob. “But I can’t live without him.”

There’s a sound much like a sob caught on a hysterical laugh and Aziraphale felt tears slide down his cheeks.

“It might be the most selfish thing I’ve ever asked for as a demon but I just can’t. I don’t know how to exist without him. So… So I’m actually on my knees. I’m on my knees and I’m praying. I’m begging you. I know I don’t deserve it. I know that there’s no place in heaven for someone like me. But… Please… If he goes back- When he goes back. Take me too?”

There was a moment of silence. Crowley was clearly waiting for an answer that he didn’t get. Then there was a sharp inhale of breath that came out in wet gasps that Aziraphale couldn’t listen to any longer. He opened the door without knocking and was kneeling before his demon faster than humanly possible. Aziraphale didn’t even notice his own miracle in his speed, he just wanted to wrap his arms around Crowley and offer comfort as soon as he could.

Crowley attempted to push away only for as long as it took Aziraphale to sigh “Oh, Crowley.” into his hair. Then Crowley all but fell into Aziraphale and clung to him with all of his strength.

They stayed this way for a long time, Aziraphale petting Crowley’s hair and Crowley quietly crying into his angel’s neck while clutching and pulling him as close as possible.

Aziraphale whispered words of comfort and love to Crowley until the demon made a low keening sound. “You shouldn’t have heard that. I didn’t want you to hear that.”

“Crowley, my dear, it’s okay.” Aziraphale rushed to say. He couldn’t bear the thought of Crowley pushing him away instead of expressing his fears. Then again, he was much the hypocrite in these matters, wasn’t he? “It’s okay. I would never leave you.”

Crowley scrunched his eyes closed and mumbled his reply into Aziraphale’s skin.

“Sorry, I didn’t quite catch that.” Aziraphale prompted and ran his fingers through that fiery red hair again in an effort to soothe.

Crowley turned his head to the side, still lay against his angel’s shoulder so he didn’t have to look into his eyes. “But you will.”

Airaphale shook his head. “No.”

“You won’t have a choice.”

“There’s always a choice.” Aziraphale said with utmost certainty. “I chose you and I will always choose you. The Almighty will answer my prayers or I will see that my prayers are answered by my own actions.”

“You say that like we have free will, angel.”

“I believe we were granted free will.”

Crowley shook his head in disagreement but didn’t argue further on that matter. He allowed the words to jump around his scared thoughts until one particular thought crept up on him. “What did you pray for?”

“You.” Aziraphale answered immediately. “To always be with you.” Then he hesitated before adding his final confession. “Even if that means not being an angel anymore.”

Crowley’s whole body convulsed at that and his head shot up to meet resigned eyes with panicked ones. “What do you mean? Angel, what did you do?”

“I haven’t done anything.” He defended truthfully if a little guilty.

Without losing his panicked look Crowley grabbed Aziraphale’s face in both hands and searched his eyes desperately for the truth. “Angel, please. Please tell me you didn’t ask to fall. I won’t let you. You’re the best angel out of all that stupid lot and I can’t let you fall!”

“Well, no. Not exactly.” He replied and began to stutter his explanation. “You see, I didn’t um… I didn’t think that, uh, you would want to be with, you know, Her again.” He gestured vaguely upwards. “And I figured as you did that there would be an end to this. To Earth. Eventually.” He looked down and away from Crowley’s burning amber eyes. Despite the overheard prayers and the conversations they’ve shared, Aziraphale still feared rejection. “So I told Her that I would follow you anywhere, even if that meant She had to let me go.”

There were tears in both their eyes then. The realisation that they had both prayed to God to let them on each others’ side so the other wouldn’t have to do something they didn’t want. It was overwhelming.

“I love you.” Crowley managed to force out between ragged, gasping breaths. “But I won’t let you fall.”

Aziraphale smiled at him and wiped his tears away with his thumbs. They were both holding the others face cradled in their palms now. “I know you won’t, my love. I have you to catch me.”


End file.
